A Place in the Sun

Earlier this year,  I published my On Grief post. Water has flowed under the bridge daily. I wanted to share some thoughts here. My mentor, Jackey Backman , joined along with me on a holiday and we ended up being 'on retreat' together - mirroring each other and bringing up the other's isuses through being a mirror for each other. She also helped me process things as they came up, while we were travelling. We were out of comms half the time and I kept her busy tapping her phone - not on social media but on a Trip Meter (which is an app that counts metres / kilometres) as we passed important signs and landmarks along our Sicily journey. We had to keep telling each other not to squirrel away in our heads and it was quite funny. BUT there was great learning for both of us, I dare say, and having Jackey along (besides the great company) felt like doing a retreat. We were doing things we don't normally do, sometimes getting uncomfortable (including having ourselves in ...

Embarking on a solo work-related journey led me to the captivating destination of Jersey. As the weekend unfolded before me, the inevitable question arose: where to dine? While the allure of retreating to the comfort of my room tugged at me—enveloped in its cold embrace, the prospect of a lackluster and solitary evening loomed. However, I chose to seize the moment differently. I envisioned this dining experience as an date with myself. With a touch of finesse, I carefully applied some makeup and wore elegant cosmetic jewelry—initially, I wasn't too sure I wanted to dress up so fancily. A couple of times, on the way to the restaurant, I resisted the temptation to buy my food from a grocery or take-away: would I have done that if I were dating someone? Or let someone do that to me? I thought, not. I thought of myself holding my own hand and must confess I almost felt shy. It was as though my lonely spirit was afraid to take the hand of my lively spirit. I came to this cute Thai resta...

They say creation comes when you are at your most emotional. But, really ? Does it ever? Many have written about writer's block, too. And that muse abandons them when they are going through difficult times. The pendulum swings either way, it seems. The last few months have been far from easy. I have swung from being crazily busy to being rendered inactive after falling off my bicycle, just before the pandemic had us in semi-lock-down. I spent all of my time during this period wearing a knee-brace, and a good chunk of that having to use crutches. I would have thought this was something that would throw me - as would being confined and forced to stay away from socialising. In reality I was healing, healing from a huge gaping hole that was caused by living with someone who had addiction and bestowing on him different kinds of love. What started off as love among equals soon turned to be, for me, a love that provided support and resolved itself, perhaps, into the son I should have ha...